Something that just happened to me
Flipping out and behaving badly – The SCORE = Emotional Regulation Disorder (1), Lara (0).
I’ve few regrets in my life. I honestly believe that everything happens for good reason (whether or no we can see it in the now) and having regrets just doesn’t jive with that sort of outlook on life – so – it is rare that I regret anything I do or say in life. Rare, but not unheard of – and – I have to admit – most recently – I succeeded in behaving very badly and letting my emotions get the better of me and just had a sort of “freak-out” to such an extreme that I lost what could have quite possibly been a most amazing relationship with a beautiful person. So – trying to see it as “water-under-the-bridge” right now is not going so well. I find myself wishing I could have a do-over, a fresh-start. I have never wanted to turn back time – until now – and I really, really, really power-want to turn back time right now to the day Ben and I met and just take it from there with my normal, calm approach to life – no over-the-top emotional excitement, and no clingy freak-outs, and no expectations whatever – just – being me. As sweet as I am, I managed to scare the man. I am taking better emotional care of myself right now and still not giving up hope for that “do-over”. Anything can happen.
